Fortune cookie jokes

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• "Virgin like balloon ... one prick, all gone."
• "Baseball wrong ... man with four balls cannot walk!"
• "A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose."
• "Secretary becomes permanent fixture when screwed on desk."
• "It takes many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it."
• "Never raise hands to angry child, it leave groin exposed."
• "Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants!"
• "War not determine who's right, war determines who's left."
• "Woman who goes to man's apartment for snack, gets titbit."
• "Man who lay woman on ground, get piece on earth."
• "Passionate kiss like spider web -- lead to undoing of fly."
• "Man with holes in pants pockets, feels cocky all day."
• "Man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night
• "Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok."